The Frame-Up by Gwenda Bond
This was the very first ARC I read in 2024 and I’ve never gotten bored by a book so quickly since. When grabbing the synopsis for this from Goodreads, I felt like my review was fully vindicated. Even people who finished the book said it was boring.
The first few chapters were so confusing and I had no idea what was going on. Those chapters are your time to explain the world, its characters and the current events but that just didn’t happen. I was expecting just a little bit of world building considering this book involves magic but nope. Just terribly boring.
Synopsis: Dani Poissant is the daughter and former accomplice of the world’s most famous art thief, as well as being an expert forger in her own right. The secret to their success? A little thing called magic, kept rigorously secret from the non-magical world. Dani’s mother possesses the power of persuasion, able to bend people to her will, whereas Dani has the ability to make any forgery she undertakes feel like the genuine article.
At seventeen, concerned about the corrupting influence of her mother’s shadowy partner, Archer, Dani impulsively sold her mother out to the FBI—an act she has always regretted. Ten years later, Archer seeks her out, asking her to steal a particular painting for him, since her mother’s still in jail. In return, he will reconcile her with her mother and reunite her with her mother’s old gang—including her former best friend, Mia, and Elliott, the love of her life.
The problem is, it’s a nearly impossible job—even with the magical talents of the people she once considered family backing her up. The painting is in the never-before-viewed private collection of deceased billionaire William Hackworth—otherwise known as the Fortress of Art. It’s a job that needs a year to plan, and Dani has just over one week. Worse, she’s not exactly gotten a warm welcome from her former colleagues—especially not from Elliott, who has grown from a weedy teen to a smoking-hot adult. And then there is the biggest puzzle of why Archer wants her to steal a portrait of himself, which clearly dates from the 1890s, instead of the much more valuable works by Vermeer or Rothko. Who is her mother’s partner, really, and what does he want?
The more Dani learns, the more she understands she may be in way over her head—and that there is far more at stake in this job than she ever realized.
The Bookshop and the Barbarian by Morgan Stang
I also didn’t get very far through this book before deciding to stop reading. It had harmful representation in just the first few chapters. Here is a direct quote from my review “The second chapter uses the phrase ‘murder-hobo’ constantly and honestly what the hell? Just before it used this phrase, there were multiple instances of the “narrator” telling you to “check your prejudice because you definitely imagined this character as fat because I said they were lazy”. Nope, that didn’t happen. The author is the one who made that assumption. Make it make sense because I can’t.” I understand that ‘murder-hobo’ is something that was used in fantasy settings but surely we’re past phrases like that?
You can tell when the vibes of a book are off and this book fell into that category for me.
Synopsis: Explore its many rooms, pick something nice off the shelf, and have a little read by the fire at the Cozy Quill Bookshop.
Running from strife in her homeland, Maribella Waters becomes the new owner of the fabled Cozy Quill. After finding squatters on her property, she employs Asteria Helsdottir, a giant, barbarian warrior woman more accustomed to swinging an axe than opening a book. Together, the odd couple must make a success out of the bookshop—and survive a dizzying procession of seasonal festivals.
But the local evil noblewoman has other plans in mind. Threatened with being run off the land, Maribella and Asteria must use their wits to outsmart Lady Malicent and keep their business open. Along the way, the whole town lends a hand, friendships are forged, and mysteries are revealed.
The Bookshop and the Barbarian is a low stakes, comedic and cozy fantasy with a slice-of-life, sapphic romance. It is about the celebration of books, autumn and winter, community, friendship, and unexpected love. There is plenty of fourth-wall breaking, and a narrator who may or may not be a green slime. And it is also very patiently waiting for you to pick it up and read it.
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